Escaping the “Superwoman Syndrome”
According to statistics, Black women are the most educated group in the country. We get degree after degree, accomplish goal after goal, but even with all of our many accomplishments, we deal with high chronic stress on a daily basis. We find ourselves showing up for everyone else, from our jobs to family and friends, while putting ourselves on the back burner. Licensed therapist Sabrina Hyland calls this the “superwoman syndrome”.
Hyland has 20 years in the game as a licensed therapist, and through her private practice, New Journey Counseling, she’s been helping high-achieving Black women slow down, shed the superwoman syndrome, and focus more on themselves.
She said it’s about finding balance, which can be hard for Black women who feel like they have to do it all or everything will fall apart.
“We have to sit down and decide what’s going to be a priority,” she said.
She suggests asking yourself: “How do you continue to move and still take care of yourself?”
It’s about “learning how to consider the fact of making themselves a priority [because] no one’s going to love you like you,” Hyland said. “You can’t depend on others to do it for you.”
Hyland talks with her clients about understanding their coping and grounding tools, which she helps them identify through the five senses. She said many of her clients have tools, but they tend to use them when they are already calm, rather than when they need them the most.
From there, she said it’s important to know the difference between coping and grounding. She said coping is doing things to help you deal with your day, like going for walks or setting a boundary.
Grounding is making sure you’re present in the moment. Sometimes, we become so overwhelmed that we can’t function, so we need tools to help ground us and focus on where we are. Some examples of grounding that Hyland provided include eating ice or choosing a color and intentionally looking around the room to spot every object in that color.
It’s a simple task to bring yourself back, so you can accomplish the things you want, both daily and in life.
“It’s important to focus on mental health because our minds can be so fragile,” Hyland said.
Signs to Look Out For
From her 20 years in the game, Hyland said there are signs Black women should look out for. One is if they don’t have good boundaries. For example, if you say you aren’t taking calls after 10 p.m. but still answer the phone when someone calls after that time, then you aren’t setting a boundary, you’re setting a rule.
Another sign is that you can’t communicate what you need or that you’re passive about it.
And lastly, she said, you don’t take care of yourself. If this last one is especially true, then she suggests taking time for self-care, which can include these four things:
- Making sure you eat a daily nutritious meal
- Having good sleeping habits
- Adding body movement to your day, whether that’s exercise, walking, or yoga
- Taking the time to relax while being present in that
These are just a few tips, but Hyland said every individual is different and needs to take the time to find what works for them.
“Over time, your body is going to make you make time,” Hyland said. “If you do it later, your body might be in crisis.”
And as a licensed therapist, Hyland suggests taking the time to meet with a therapist. If you’re interested in working with Hyland, visit her website by clicking here.
This article is part of the 2026 Carvd N Stone Mental Health Awareness Month Series. Throughout the series, we are highlighting Black women in the mental health field, including therapists, advocates, and wellness leaders, as they share insights, personal experiences, and practical tips to help people better prioritize and navigate their mental health.
Nyesha Stone founded Carvd N Stone in 2017 to cover positive news while attending the University of Wisconsin-Milwaukee. Stone has a B.A. in Journalism. She has raised over $30,000 to award grants and scholarships. She has also been featured in ESSENCE and worked with the American Black Film Festival.
- Nyesha Stone
